So after my last posting of "firsts" for my children, today I experienced a "first" in my own life. It is still so new and i just need to talk about it or something.
So I don't know if I posted about our neighborhood here...it's great. We live in a cul-de-sac and all the neighbors have been so kind. We do have one "weird" neighbor kiddy corner from us, but we've tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and just not judge them by their appearance. They have a 7 year old son who the boys LOVE to play with...i mean literally he's been over at our house for hours every summer day. I try not to be judgemental and always let him play over (just not the other way around). The little boy is really polite and has always been so happy to play with the boys, especially since Cameron is the next closest to his age in our little neighborhood. Oh, and he has a mohawk that goes into a long mullet, as well as a gold stud in each ear, and he's about 15 lbs overwight for a 7 year old, oh, and comes over in his flannel pj bottoms with no shirt no matter the temperature outside.
So anyways, he plays with my kids all the time, and they love him. Today we go outside to ride bikes and this father comes up to me and wants to speak to me in private. I get a little nervous and say okay. He then tells me that he heard we were mormon and is this true. I tell him yes. He says that he is sorry but his son can't play with my children anymore and they can't talk to us ever. I try to be kind with a smile and tell him we are just Christian people and he tells us we are not and we need to realize what our religion is. He "bashes" for a minute or two more and proceeds to walk away.
So I am totally shocked and come inside and it hits me...i just lose it! It's really silly but I just felt so hurt. I think I've just felt like I've been so kind to their son and just welcomed him into our home and then they find out we are "mormon" and we are like the devil to them. I actually am relieved he won't be knocking on our door 24/7 anymore, but now I just am sad I have to explain to Cameron why he can't play with this boy anymore. Oh, and after he tells me this, I go outside (all emotional of course) b/c my kids are riding bikes and I see him go to the other neighbors and talk to each one of them....i wonder what he said. Then Cameron sees the boy and the boy calls out to him "Cameron, I can't play with you anymore". Luckily I was right there and just brushed it off to cameron.
Anyways, so how can people be so intollerant and unkind when they call themselves Christian? Aren't we supposed to try to be like Christ?
In the end, I'm not really worried about the neighbors thinking anything of us. They are all normal and I can't imagine what I would think if some guy (who is more than a little odd with fairly odd-looking offspring) told me not to let my kids play with another neighbor who is totally normal and nice, because of their religion.
After growing up in NY and living in Seattle for 4 years and Salt lake for 2, this is a first for me!
7 comments:
how hard! i am sorry that that happened to you. i feel sorry for that man, obviously has major issues.
it sounds like you handled it perfectly though. i think that i would have said that i was wanting to have the same talk with him about not having my kids play together, because my kids don't play with whitetrash! mature i know.
in all seriousness though, that stinks, especially since you were always nice to them. hang in there.
Oh I'm so sorry. I would have completely lost it and cried right in front of him.
You know, Kim, I can totally relate to this one. One of my first weeks in Liberty Lake I took the kids to the McDonalds playplace. The two mom's next to me starting talking really negatively about another mom that was Mormon. This Mormon mom had been watching the ladies kids and after a series of events she started saying a lot of bad things about the Mormon and then they started bashing the BOM really loudly and mocking what they perceived to be our beliefs. I was really in shock. I mean, if I were Jewish or black would they be saying racial comments so loudly?
So, I decided (without thinking) that if I wanted to teach my kids to stand up for the gospel than I had better do the same. I kindly approached them (heart pounding with indignation) and told them that I hoped they wouldn't judge all of US by a bad experience and then she started BERATING me so I kindly told her that her facts were off, packed up the kids and left.
Not even in Utah had I encountered such malevolence. I chalk it up to ignorance. I believe, as you said, that to be like Christ means not only to be tolerant of ALL people, but to be loving to them, too. We are told to love our neighbors and pray for them.
One side note, I have found that as far as neighbor kids go, it's really best to play with them outside. Have BOUNDARIES.
Kim-
I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience. I think you handled it with class and dignity. Kudos to you!
Kim Johnson
check out my blog at kjohnson5.blogspot.com
Wow, I am so stunned by your neighbor's ignorance! But, I think you handled it so well, and you have nothing to regret. What a learning experience. But, I do completely agree with Team Howey's side note to have your kids play with the nieghbor kids outside. When we first moved into our neighborhood, we wanted to be so nice and welcoming. But, we've learned through one not so pleasant experience that neighbor friends are to stay outside only. And my kids don't go inside our neighbor's houses either. Thank goodness school has started :)
Wow...I think that would make me cry too. Poor little boy. If he can't play with everyone his father decides to be predjudiced about, he is going to be one lonely kid.
Whoa! Sorry about your neighbor. That is so wrong. I hate when people think it is okay to Mormon bash. It's just as wrong as racial prejudice. Kim, you handled it like a champ and I think you're great for welcoming that boy into your home without judgement. You should be proud of yourself.
On a side note, when we moved in here and met our next door neighbor, the lady told us she has 5 kids. Then she goes, "My husband wanted to have another and I said, 'Are you crazy? We're not Mormon!'" Micah then goes, "Oh, we are." Then there was an awkward silence. Nothing like your hateful neighbor, but still kinda funny.
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